Discouragement Along
the Spiritual Path

Often times I think I should be a better mediator, more advanced, more kind, more loving, more aware, more….

I can even know that kind of thinking is a trap, but the thinking feels so RIGHT! I really should be farther along; I really should be more aware; I really should be…

I need to recognize is that this thinking and these thoughts do not come from my soul, but my ego (which never thinks it is where it is supposed to be). There’s a great line for an old Jackson Browne song called Your Bright Baby Blues: “I’ve been up and down this highway far as my eyes can see, no matter how fast I run I can never get away from me. No matter how hard I try I’m always a day away from where I want to be.”

The ego has not sense of where the Spirit is, and certainly has no idea where it is ‘supposed’ to be.

 

I need to be aware that I am so being caught up in the ‘comparison trap or as they say so wonderfully in Alanon, “I’m comparing my insides with other people’s outsides.”

I am also forgetting that this is my journey towards wholeness. The speed of my journey is not increased by how hard I push, but by my willingness to be open and grow, even though I have not idea how that is happening now or how it is supposed to happen in the future.

Although it is difficult to accept sometimes, I am exactly where I am supposed to be--How could I be anywhere else?

Pablo Casals (1876-1973) was a Spanish cellist who came to be known as the best cellist in the world. At age 93 he was asked why he continued to practice the cello three hours a day and he replied, “I’m beginning to notice some improvement …”